Thursday, May 26, 2011

Splinters and pizza

Today Caleb turned to me in the car and said "Mama, I"m hungry!" with a big expectant grin on his face.  Later that evening I pulled another splinter out of his finger.  Peroxide, needle, tweezers, band-aid...the whole nine yards.  My beautiful little boy sobbed alligator tears into my neck while Larry pried his hand open and I extracted a large splinter.  After the surgery, we had pizza for dinner and Caleb-boo affirmed that "it's very tasty Mama."  My son took comfort in my presence and depended on me to fulfill his needs. We are sons of the living God who desires to feed and heal us.  I cannot image He does not delight in our trust as I delight in Caleb's.

Monday, May 23, 2011

True heroism

I'm on my second cup of decaf since I put Caleb and Evie down for their naps.  This is what I love about being a stay-at-home mommy: I have the option to read and sip coffee or work really hard during nap times. Today I need to do something other than clean!  ;)  I love that I now have space and time to consult my Father and think through tough issues (and blog).  While I was teaching, every spare moment was eaten up with lesson plans, tedious grading, and writing curriculum (contrary to how it sounds, teaching wasn’t all bad).  I am so grateful that I trusted God enough to stop relying on my teaching paycheck to provide for my family.  I now rely on God working through my hubby to provide for us.  Whew. What a burden lifted!

Quitting my job has helped me prove God is faithful to His word.  God promises that "whosoever believes on Him shall not be put to shame" (Rm. 10:11).  I looked up the word “ashamed” in Hebrew and it  means to “flee” – from fear.  I see those "NO FEAR" bumper stickers around town.  Do they really know what they are saying?? It seems as though they are trying to convince themselves.  I can say "NO TO FEAR" because I (daily) place all my belief in Christ and abide in Him. I have a boldness and will not be ashamed now or during the day of judgment.  Can you imagine?  We have the right to be bold because as He is, so are we in this world (1 John 2:28; 4:17). 

I want to pattern the thoughts of my children in this way – fearing nothing from man or God because they know they are purchased property.  I want them to daily see the fruit of trusting and submitting to their heavenly Father.  I want Caleb and Evelynn to watch their parents step out on the word of God and not be disappointed.  Even as they are sleeping in their cribs, we are living out two of huge examples of God never putting us to shame: 1) God told me to marry Larry Newman (risky business, that marriage stuff!), and 2) God showed me that it was best to quit teaching.  Both of these supremely terrifying decisions have reaped a bounty of good fruit for our family. God is faithful to His word.  

Throughout scripture God reminds us that He will never leave or forsake us, fail us, or disappoint us.  He promises that He loves us unconditionally and that He is working everything into His plan for good. God is the true hero we read about in romance novels. The one who surrounds us with His love and will never break our hearts. 

Saturday, May 14, 2011

The weight of a blessing

The warm weight of a sleeping baby is one way God makes motherhood and wife-dom  worth the (strenuous) effort!  I just put Evelynn down for her nap.  She snuggled close, looked up and smiled in my general direction, and sighed a contented sigh.  I was so blessed that I just sat there staring at her without moving for several minutes.  Larry and I have been talking a lot about God's provision and our believing.  Our Father promises that He will provide all our needs.  The promise I am hanging my hat on right now is Eph. 2:19 which says that we are in the household of God.  The verse makes me giggle when I think about my kids. My children absolutely do not worry about rent.  They do not wonder if there will be enough food for dinner.  They know they will always have a safe, comfy place to sleep.  In short, they implicitly understand that their needs will be met by their parents.  As a matter of fact, when a child fears they will not be taken care of even our carnal society recognizes there is something wrong and has developed agencies like Child Protective Services.  Well, we are children in God's household.  He will provide all our needs.  My job is simply to trust my Father.  Following the same analogy, I am so blessed as a mother when Caleb responds to me with trust.  I am blessed when he seeks me for comfort.  I wonder if God is not so different.

Today we spent the morning at Mike and Kathy's house.  We all had a blast.  Caleb ate and ate, like always.  Whenever we mention Kathy, he immediately says, "cookies?!?!" :)  Today he was served waffles with jam and yogurt and tea in his own special, porcelain tea cup.  He was very excited.  Evie looked stunning in her new navy blue and white sailor suit, compliments of Kathy and Felicity.  Dave and Hil showed up at some point in the morning, and we were all blessed to be together as a family - eating, praying, talking and generally enjoying the party.

I keep thinking about the verse that admonishes us to "forget not all His blessings."  Although they are harder to "see", spiritual blessings have more weight than physical.  My family was so blessed to be with the saints this morning.  I was so happy to watch my children be loved on and cared for while learning and having fun. 

Larry and I are working through some very tough issues born of our previous marriages, but God is producing much fruit in our lives as we become one flesh.  Our children are literally thriving (have you seen Evie's thighs lately??), healthy, and happy.  They are learning obedience and God's love.  Our home is safe and comfortable; our vehicles are running; our bodies are sound; our hearts are at peace.  These spiritual blessings are worth more than the sum total of our national debt! What a lie from satan that I would even consider that my Father has not provided for me just because I don't have the latest and greatest.  Thank God I have my little sleepy Evie to remind me that my life is NOT physical, but eternal, and in His capable hands.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

An attempt

Today was a lovely, relaxing Sunday.  As the babies grow (and sleep longer through the night) and our marriage matures, family life just gets sweeter.  This morning we made oatmeal-banana pancakes, bacon, and eggs.  Yum. Caleb ate his weight in pancakes, staked high with plain yogurt and jam.  Evelynn slurped and spit up most of her teaspoon or so of mashed banana, a process which took 30 minutes.  :)  She made us all laugh.  Caleb decided he wanted to go to church with Daddy while Evie and I stayed home to nap.  I journaled in the sun shine while she slept.  Then we went for a wonderful walk while we listened to the teaching via the conference line.  It was a deliciously quite and uneventful walk.

***

I started this blog nearly a week ago.  I only got as far as the first paragraph above.  My folks came over for dinner tonight.  We had pot roast.  They taught Caleb how to do a somersault - something I attempted to do this morning before realizing I could no longer preform a simple roll without fear of breaking my neck.  The kids did well for their nana and papa.

Larry has been working out of the house for the last week or so.  It's difficult to have him gone for so many hours a day.  I am beginning to feel the full weight of being a full-time, stay-at-home-mom and wife (that's a lot of hyphens!).  Being home with the kids all day alone is challenging.  Evelynn is teething.   Need I say more?  She is like our own crying baby setting on the sound machine.  Caleb does really well with her.  He can make her laugh and giggle through tears.

***

Apparently this has become a multi-day blog attempt.  Both kids are napping now (or are in their cribs at least).  I just put Evelynn down.  She looks just like a little pink jelly bean.  She's curled into a fetal position, wearing a pink jumper.  Caleb just hollered from his crib, "Jacqwin! Baby bear fell out!" (yes, he is very excited to have learned my name and uses it frequently because it makes his daddy laugh).  After retrieving his baby bear, Emily, perhaps he'll go to sleep.

I think I'll put this blog out of its misery.  I have no exiting new insights to report or truly memorable moments to record.  I'm just plodding along as a new creation in Christ, trying to be the mother and wife God created me to be.